The Perfect Match

What can be said when one finds his perfect match?
The one that he believes could actually understand him.
The one he knows that he could always show love and patience;
more than words, actions put to death the doubts they are against.

I believe that I have found that woman in a tattered down soul
darker than the night that she is fighting to rest her head.
She carries beauty within herself, like a pocket full of diamonds
that most would miss if they do not have the eyes to find them.

She is hurting from the same things that are killing me
and we both have very similar beginnings to our handwritten stories.
Except it was like she stepped out of the pages of my diary
coming to life before my eyes, like a sad girl prophecy.

Now that she is here she is as broken as I had known she’d be
and is constantly afraid of the things that she cannot offer me.
If she had anything or everything, I would not wish to take it,
but make an apartment in her heart, a mutual safety.

I just want to feed her heart, but I know I cannot heal
the thousands of bruises that turned her to stone.
But to pay it back with careful attention and daily poetry
because there is no one else that can inspire me
like she does.

Just to be there for her would be her giving to me
and make her tea at 3:30 when she is not able to sleep.
And she could do these things, and give them back to me,
because I am always dying in my sleep
of a thousand lonely suicides.

When night comes and the owls perch upon their branch
and the cats take the streets and the fields are becoming damp;
these are the times I think of her the most but feel most lonely
because I’m fucked up and even those who claim to know me
do not.

She once told me that there are little moments that require me to be in them
and that I should embrace them and hold them like precious gems,
that denying these moments from happening would be a tragedy.
Like the squid sinking the ship as the whole crew drowns in the sea.

But that is what this life is, a battle between monsters and me
that wish to break my vessel and carry me to the darkest deep.
Where there is no hope of finding any kind of peace
but that of which is offered by swallowing the sea.

I told her once that I loved her but she couldn’t accept my hand
because she has no love to give to anyone, especially a man.
She feels that I am only in love with the idea of her
healing something inside of me that cannot be repaired.

I’ve never been one that wanted to keep a lot of friends
because friendship is a relationship that too easily ends
when I leave for another county or state
running to or from my constant feelings of self hate
running to or from my permanent life changing mistake
running to or from the life I have to live…
but friendship is all she is willing to give.

So again I ask…
(and please feel free to answer me)

What can be said when one finds his perfect match?
Another dark soul walking the road less travelled…
I am given everything in nothing
but she is given nothing in everything.

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The Perfect Match

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